12.08.2007

A few updates

Life has been busy since my last post. Thanks to all of you who have posted here and to those who have emailed me, you guys are the greatest. Each note brought a bit of joy into my day, thank you so much. I thought it was time to post some updates here.

My mother is doing much better. She did a round of radiation therapy for the bone cancer in her skull and spine. She was very sick at first after the radiation, we were all so worried about her. It's been about 5 weeks since then and she is just starting to get her appetite back. Her catch phrase during this ordeal is, "I'm not going to sit under this." This healthy attitude towards life is one of her greatest assets. We decided as a family that Mom should probably move in with one of her five daughters, instead she moved in with her granddaughter, Tiffany.

Tiffany is like a sixth daughter to my mother. After all my sisters and I were out of the house my mother babysat for Tiffany before and after school and during school and summer vacations while my sister worked. Tiffany saw a much different woman than my sisters and I saw when we were growing up. My mother had 5 girls in the span of 10 years and the chaos meter at our house was usually set pretty high. Tiffany enjoyed her grandparents while they were still young empty nesters. They could spend quality time with her in a relaxed atmosphere. My mother and Tiffany always had a very strong bond.

My mother moved to North Carolina to live with Tiffany last week. Tiffany lives about a mile from her mother, aka my sister. My sister and my niece will take very good care of her. My mother is very lucky to have them. There was nothing they wanted more than to take care of Mom, I think they would have paid a million dollars for the privilege. The rest of my sisters and I wanted to share our homes with Mom too, but Tiffany seemed like the best option. I got knocked out of the running for a couple of reasons. The first is because my house is 2 stories and my mother has trouble with stairs. The second is because I'm actively raising my son and have a full time job. My sister in NC is done raising her family, and my niece is single. They have the time, space and dedication to make this work. We were all somewhat concerned about Tiffany making this kind of commitment. She's a young woman in her early 20's and we thought she should be concentrating on building her future life. Tiffany would not be deterred, there was nothing she wanted to do more than take care of her grandmother. She's a remarkable young woman.

Mom was too sick to pack up her belongings to move to North Carolina, so I took on that responsibility for her. The moving truck is in transit between NY and NC right now. Mom is anxiously awaiting the arrival of her things, it will feel much more like home with all her things there.

My mother seems to be doing well in her new home. She is feeling better and is in good spirits. I am concerned about all the change in her life. Dad died a couple of years ago and she was diagnosed with cancer a couple months ago. She just moved away from a community she's lived in for 40+ years, leaving behind 4 daughters, multiple grandchildren and many friends in NY. She also had to change her medical team. All in all, I feel confident that we made the best decision.

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We made a brief trip to Washington, D.C. in November. My husband and I have been to D.C. on other occasions, but it was a first for my son. We made good use of our time in D.C.; we toured the Capitol, several museums, the monuments and the zoo. It was a first for me to see the National WWII Memorial and Korean War Veterans Memorial. I was so impressed with these memorials; they are wonderful tributes to our country's veterans.

My son recently had a Spanish assignment for homework. He had to create a collage with pictures of his family members and write something about them in Spanish to accompany the picture. I can't read Spanish, so I asked him what he wrote about me. He said he wrote where I was born, where I live now, and my age. I wasn't overly thrilled that he put my age on his poster, so I asked him why he did that. He said I shouldn't be that concerned because of the contest in fourth grade a few years ago. Apparently the children in his fourth grade class decided to see who had the oldest parents, and I "won" in the mother category. Parenting is so much fun.
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45 Comments:

Blogger Karin said...

I was just thinking about you this morning. I'm so glad your mom is doing better and that you were able to post again. Take care.

12/8/07, 1:40 PM  
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Blogger mon@rch said...

thanks for the update and I am glad your mother is in good hands! Lets hope the warmer weather can help with some of her new adjustments. I have never been to DC and seems like things went good with that trip! Good to see you saying hello!

12/8/07, 2:31 PM  
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Blogger David said...

we always knew you were a winner!
I am so glad that you r mom has a good solution to her care needs. We need to love and give to the ones who gave so much to us.
5 daughters in ten years, she should have been given some sort of award for that!!!!
God has blessed your family.
Shalom

12/8/07, 4:21 PM  
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Blogger Renee said...

I'm so glad to hear that your mom is doing better. I'm also glad to hear how well she is adjusting to everything. Send her our love.

I'm also glad that you caught us all up on your life...but please don't feel obligated. We love you even when we dont hear from you.

Hugs

12/8/07, 4:22 PM  
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Blogger Marie said...

Good to hear from you Barbara. Glad your Mom is doing better and is settling into her new home... I bet she won't miss winter in NY!

I'll win oldest Mom award too, when my son's classes take polls!

12/8/07, 6:48 PM  
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Blogger Veronika said...

So glad to see you update! It seems as if your Mother will be in good hands. Please feel at ease knowing that Tiffany wants to do this.
Now I know where you get your determination!

12/8/07, 6:58 PM  
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Blogger FRIDAY'S CHILD said...

You know when I saw you visiting my site, I immediately thought "Oh she's up again" but when I went to visit you, you weren't there. This morning I tried again and Voila! there you are. I'm happy to hear about your mom. She seems to be a strong determined woman. Determined of what she wants. It's nice to have you back and thanks for visiting me too.

12/8/07, 8:09 PM  
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Blogger Patricia said...

What a sweet post, Barbara, and what a blessing you and your sisters are to each other and your mother. And Tiffany. Bless her heart. She will never regret this opportunity to care for and love on her grandmother. Your trip to DC sounds delightful. I was 2 months shy of 41 when I gave birth to my daughter. I suspect I would have won had she been in your son's class! =) Hope your weekend is perfectly delightful. You have been missed.

12/8/07, 8:34 PM  
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Blogger chichimama said...

I'm glad your mom is doing well, and Tiffany sounds like a wonderful young woman. It sounds like thing s are going as well as they could go.

I have been thinking of you...

12/8/07, 11:54 PM  
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Blogger LadyBugCrossing said...

I'm so glad your mom is feeling better. I think that her decision to move to where she wants to be, where it is warm -- NY is COLD!!!, and where the medical care is terrific. She will be in our thoughts and prayers.
xoxo
LBC

12/9/07, 7:09 AM  
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Blogger Lazy Daisy said...

So glad your mom is making the adjustment and has gotten her appetite and some strength back. I know you must be relieved to have her condo all packed up now.

As far as winning....oldest mother...I think Sarah (90) in the Bible holds the record.

12/9/07, 12:30 PM  
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Blogger Shelli said...

At least he is honest. You gotta take credit for that. Your niece has to be one special person. It sounds like your mom did well all around, raising daughters and granddaughters.

12/9/07, 10:07 PM  
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Blogger Jennifer said...

I have been thinking of you and missing you. I'm glad that your mom is settled in and being taken care of. I hope you're able to relax and enjoy the holidays!!
It's so good to see you again!

12/9/07, 10:12 PM  
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Blogger J. Andrew Lockhart said...

I'm glad to hear that things are going well.
Don't feel bad about the age thing. When my youngest is in 7th grade, I'll be 52!

12/10/07, 12:11 AM  
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Blogger Mar said...

How nice to see you updating your blog, Barbara, you have been dearly missed.
My MIL and my son have a special bond, much richer than the bond with her own son!! so I can understand your niece. How wonderful for your mom to have Tiffany and your sister very close.
Next time you need help in Spanish just let me know ::wink::

12/10/07, 3:10 AM  
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Blogger Suldog said...

Barbara:

I'm very glad to hear that things seem to be getting better. Your Mom sounds like a strong woman who will do whatever needs to be done and few complaints. Good for her!

God bless.

12/10/07, 12:20 PM  
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Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said...

Thanks for updating us all on how things are. Glad to hear how your mother is.

12/10/07, 3:12 PM  
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Blogger David said...

parenting is all there is in my world, and then when you get older, if God is merciful enough to let your parents get old, where they need your help, you get to reverse parent, but you can never pay them back completely.

12/12/07, 10:14 AM  
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Blogger Carol said...

What a blessed Mother she is.

12/13/07, 1:57 AM  
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Blogger Muhd Imran said...

Glad to know that your Mom is recovering well and you're back.

That is wonderful of Tiffany indeed. Beautiful family you have there.

It must have been interesting for your son to witness democracy in action. It was even more interesting for us to actually be inside Capitol building when we were in Austin Texas a long time ago.

Welcome back. Great to hear from you again.

12/16/07, 2:06 AM  
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Blogger Uisce said...

I'm glad to hear that your mother's doing better.

It's funny you mention the age thing. Of the parents in my oldest daughter's class, I feel like a youngster. She's 16. The youngest just turned 10. I feel like one of the older parents in her class. So I guess I'll stick with my oldest kid! :)

12/16/07, 5:04 PM  
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Blogger DeeJay said...

So glad to hear your Mother is feeling better and your mind is a little more at ease.

Bummer about the age thing, heh.

Be well and enjoy your holiday season!

12/17/07, 9:36 AM  
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Blogger Mar said...

You are greatly missed, Barbara!! this is to wish you and yours a very merry Xmas and a healthy 2008.

12/20/07, 6:59 AM  
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Anonymous viamarie said...

I work in a hospital and I am witness to all these patients who go through chemo and from your stories your mom is truly a fighter. Am glad she's better now.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! May our world this coming year, and all the years to come, be blessed with peace, love, joy and bountiful blessings.

12/24/07, 3:12 AM  
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Blogger Muhd Imran said...

Just stopping by again to wish you and your whole family to be in the best of health.

MERRY CHRISTMAS & JOYOUS NEW YEAR!!!

12/25/07, 1:57 AM  
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Blogger Jennifer said...

I was trying to get around to all my blogs yesterday to wish everyone a Merry Christmas but I ran out of time. I hope yours was a wonderful one, all the same...you were in my thoughts! :)

12/25/07, 8:45 PM  
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Blogger Veronika said...

Thinking of you
:)

12/27/07, 7:31 AM  
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Blogger craziequeen said...

I'm glad your mom is doing better :-) It's difficult when parents are sick.

The crazie one is 'laid bare' at the Palace today.

cq

12/30/07, 8:55 AM  
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Blogger J. Andrew Lockhart said...

I hope all is going well with you.

12/31/07, 3:27 AM  
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Blogger craziequeen said...

Hi Barb - here's to 2008 and hoping it is better than 2007 in so many ways.

:-)

cq

12/31/07, 5:19 PM  
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Blogger MamaGeek said...

Oh Barbara. I am so glad you posted my friend. I have thought of you so so so often. I am glad your Mom is being taken care of so well and has such a positive attitude. We have all missed you SO much. SO VERY MUCH.

Stay strong and know you're in our thoughts and prayers. Here's hoping for a happier and healthier 2008!!

And that photo of her is amazing.

1/2/08, 10:59 PM  
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Blogger Nicole said...

Just wanted you to know that I am checking in on you and hope your new year has gotten off to a better start.

1/3/08, 12:13 PM  
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Blogger Mar said...

Hi, Barbara! an unknown little bird crossed my way during the holidays but didn't leave his name...perhaps you could help me? Last picture here. Only if you have some time...
Have a nice day :)

1/4/08, 3:17 AM  
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Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said...

Glad to see your visit, Barbara.

1/5/08, 5:28 AM  
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Blogger Jane said...

I have not visited in a while (I'm so sorry!!) but I wanted to let you know how glad I am that your mom is better and that she is adjusting to her move.
Your trip to DC looked like fun. I haven't been in years but would like to visit again sometime.
Have a great week!

1/7/08, 6:22 PM  
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Blogger Veronika said...

Glad to see you around the blogsphere, but glad to know that you're taking care of important things.
xoxo

1/7/08, 11:20 PM  
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Blogger Margie said...

Hi Barbara
It's been so long since I've visited you!
I've been away from the blog world.
So sorry to hear about your mom!
I'll keep her in my prayers!

Hope the New Year will bring you and your family joy, love, peace and laughter!

Margie

1/11/08, 2:47 PM  
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Blogger Jake Silver said...

Stll waiting on your active return to the Blog-O-sphere.

1/13/08, 5:45 AM  
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Blogger David said...

missing you, barbara.
hope all is well

1/17/08, 3:49 AM  
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Blogger Patricia said...

Barbara, I've been thinking about you and praying that everything is ok. (((Hugs)))

1/21/08, 1:44 PM  
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Blogger david santos said...

Hi Barbara

Excellent post!
Thank you.
have a good day

1/22/08, 9:49 AM  
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Blogger LadyBugCrossing said...

Love your pictures!
That cardinal is gorgeous!
xo
LBC

2/3/08, 6:50 PM  
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Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said...

Thanks for keeping us up to date.

2/4/08, 2:47 PM  
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Blogger Killired said...

HELLO!!!! i miss reading you! hope you are keeping warm in all this yucky weather!!!

2/4/08, 11:33 PM  
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Blogger Minerva said...

I am so sorry to hear about your mother: cancer is never easy particularly on your own...

Thinking of you,

Minerva

2/9/08, 9:14 PM  
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